Imaginary <3

Was it me,
That spoiled your soul?
That took you in,
And filled each hole.

With shit and dirt,
And rotting bones.
Now I look at you,
And throw these stones.

I think I broke you,
Long ago.
I think the person I loved,
I took to stow.

But I don’t know where I placed you,
I don’t know where to look.
My biggest fear, is the person I hid,
Was someone I mistook.

You weren’t really him,
And maybe I wasn’t me.
So now we are fighting for something,
That was never meant to be.

But I hold onto this image,
Of this guy in my head.
That one that was perfect,
But the idea is dead.

I know that I do this,
And I know that I run.
Perfection is no where,
And there isn’t the one.

So I sit here and wonder,
If for you I should fight.
But now all I see is the shit and the dirt,
So I think I’ll take flight.

And you’ll kiss me goodbye,
And my tears, they will drop.
I will torture myself,
Wondering why did I stop?

Time will go on,
You will be another one in the past,
I’ll create so many scenarios,
Of how I could have made it last.

But something feels off here,
I imagine it’s me.
The thoughts are suffocating,
I’ll let go of you, so I can be free.