Ever forgotten

Ever forgotten the word for turtle?
черепаха.

Ever forgotten the word for dress?
dress
dress
dress

платье!

Ever forgotten how to pronounce your last name in your first language?

Yes.

Ever been too embarrassed to ask?

Yes.

At least I know my first name
know it means
peace
but it often feels like war.

War
war
war

…nothing

I’ve noticed when I have nothing
I fill in the space with anger
with leave
with not interested

what I mean is
I don’t know how to say
what I mean
what I mean
what I mean

Is I will bury my parents
with having never known anything
of substance
see I don’t know how to ask
anything of substance
I don’t even know the word for
substance
substance
substance

…nothing.